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Pervert. I’m not referring to Big Boobs/Breasts, Big Butts nor Double Dicks. Although it’s every/any man’s fantasy (even mine to some extent). I’m sorry to disappoint you. Ladies, if you got excited reading the title; I’ve disappointed you deeply. None of that here.

There’s plenty of porn sites out there. Simply click here.
This is from the add-on Video Download Helper. I browsed across this while learning how to use it when it was a new add-on years ago. Who knew it would have a section for pervs?

I’m a person with great imagination:

“Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited to all we now know and understand, while imagination embraces the entire world, and all there ever will be to know and understand.”

Albert Einstein


 

Welcome to my life

Bullying – Betrayal & Disappointment – Depression.

In Canada & US (and probably many other countries); I’m sure the school board education “Grade” system are the same:

  1. Preschool – 2~4 years old
  2. Junior Kindergarten – 5 years old
  3. Senior Kindergarten – 6 years old
  4. Grade 1 – 7 years old
  5. Grade 8 – 14 years old
  6. Grade 9 – 15 years old (start of High School).
  7. Grade 12 – 18 years old (Graduate from HS)

I was bullied at the age of 6. The reason I remember this was because Pogs were popular to the point where everyone was playing for keeps & I was really good at it. An Indian classmate that was one year older was one of those troublemaker kids. He’d push others & tell them to do this or that; or they’ll “get beat up”. Back then; the notion was if someone hit you, you’d hit them back. Naturally; as 5~7 year old kids, we’d be scared not to even tell our parents…unless you would be one of those to fight back of course.

He would pick on me specifically; pushing me down to the ground & even scrambling my pogs so everyone else could pick them up. I was so mad but yet sad at the same time.

After settling down in Markham during Grade 5; I found my phone book of the old friends I had. The first thing I did was contact my close friend (more like childhood friends; we knew each other since Jr. K) to tell him everything about this new place. One other friend moved up around my area; but I lost contact with him. Others moved away. However; one of them…an unexpected event happened; and I will never ever forget the words he said to me.

This friend was a mutual friend of my childhood friend; and we hung around together many times. Even played video games at their house. When I contacted him; he said to me: “Who’s this? Why did you call? We’re not really friends”. I was so shocked…I lost appetite for a while.
Seriously? We game play games, eat and laugh together but not friends? Just wow.

Elementary wasn’t as fun as I’d imagined. Many picked on me since I was always shortest (and probably since I’m quiet). Additionally, since growing up in a specific neighborhood, everyone knows one another following the same elementary & high school.
You wouldn’t know the humiliation of someone smiling or laughing at you thinking they like you when someone has taped (or yellow sticking) a welcoming Kick Me behind you unless you’ve experienced it yourself.
It might be a good prank; but not when used consistently everyday.

And; words hurt. Just cause you believe the joke is funny; others feel differently.
Best examples: A classmate said to me during drama class in grade 8:

We’re not laughing with you, we’re laughing at you.

Feelings are hurt when this happens. Somewhere along the lines in high school; I made a joke to a teacher and she took it offensively and I got sent to the principal’s office awaiting possible expulsion (ironic I know), but things happen beyond control and always think carefully.

I suppose I’m one of the lucky ones; I wasn’t shoved into lockers or garbage bins considering my height. I never got a wedgie. One would laugh yes. Very low-level prank, but it’s different coming from bullies.

Six degrees of separation play a big factor in life. Especially once a rumor spreads, it’s a matter of time before everyone knows. Same applies to bullies. When people talk, you’d know to stay away from them. During grade 5, there was a large build black classmate. Tough attitude and all. Saying things like “What you looking at?” “I’ll break your face”. (Sounds like 50 Cent).

I don’t mean to be offensive or racist. I understand where you’re coming from.
Might not believe me; but please do. Just this once?

As someone who has read the book of Harriet Tubman (awesome book; I still remember to this day and to be truthful was the first novel book I ever fully read) about saving black people from slavery during civil war. Better known as Moses in the black community. War is a topic I’d rather avoid.

There was another rumor in my life that…if I mentioned it and one of my classmates see this; they’ll all be like LOL I remember that. And you’d probably laugh too.

Ladies and gents; rumors had it that I was punched in the balls and I went to get my balls ultrasound.

Yes; go ahead laugh. Honestly, even I’m laughing now LOL.

What really happened was a classmate did a quick jab somewhere around the left kidney; and it hurt like hell. Since then; he wasn’t a friend of mine anymore. Make no mistake; it wasn’t that I unfriended him. It was him that unfriended me after the incident; and joined the “cool kids” and spread the rumor.

I was famous for awhile…and not with the right reason. I felt back-stabbed. Having him turn on me just because of something small and spreading such a huge false rumor.

My biggest disappointment was just before I graduated from high school.
I had a very close group of friends. You can say the crazy types.
If you’d ask the only female within the group (my god-sister); she’d agree with me.

I’m sure many people have played spin the bottle right?
For starters; I was never invited (I’m unsure if it requires players that actually can drink alcohol or wine). I wasn’t even mad at that though. It was the fact that my god-sister had french kissed her crush (who was one within the group of friends) and none of them told me about it. It was during the weekend. That following Monday, I went to school like a normal day, with people smiling and all at me; I felt something had happened. Whispers here and there. “Is it true? Does he know?”

Six degrees of separation has gone through the entire high school and I was still clueless.  My friend says to them “Yeah he knows.” I just smiled and nodded to whatever it was. Later that day, I overheard others talking about it.

I was mad & disappointed at the same time. I thought to myself why does this keep happening? I thought I had real close friends.

Somewhere I belong. In the end, it doesn’t really matter.

“He’s a shy & quiet person.” “He’s such a dumb person; never learning something properly.” “He’s in that group? Feel bad for them.” “I wouldn’t want him in my group”

That’s the first impression everyone gets from me and problem is; it follows you if you live in the same neighborhood for half your life. I’ve long known my weaknesses, not knowing any strengths. Six degrees of separation follows you everywhere.

We judge people on a daily basis. Honestly, I judged myself as shy & quiet all my life. Hell, I was so shy back then; I couldn’t even look into a girl’s face (eyes if lucky) without having my face turn red unless it’s someone I know. Even then, it occasionally happens.

I’ve lacked self-confidence to point I never looked myself in the mirror longer than 2 seconds. I understood why so many people committed suicide due to bullying or depression because I had thoughts of it too. I completely closed myself off after graduating from HS. Going on the Internet & making a new identity for myself. That’s where my MapleStory addiction began.

I wanna be somebody else.

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